Implicit Child Abuse of Antigay People as Children Growing Up?
In lectures that I have given I explain these thoughts about possible “implicit child abuse” growing up of antigay people. When you listen to anyone who is antigay, we never hear any substantiated facts. It reminds me of a friend of mine in high school who got into some trouble. I asked him the next day at school, what his dad had to say? He said, “Well, if you cut out all the swearing, he didn’t say much." That is the way it seems to be with people who are antigay. They tend to be forceful, heated, irrational, and overpowering, but offering absolutely no content. There often seems to be this sense of being mean “to be mean, as mean as you can be” to another human being. They tend to be reacting like people who had been abused as children, unable to communicate rationally their thoughts and feelings about homosexuality, to verbalize their thoughts and feelings. Heuristically, speaking what we may be experiencing from these antigay people is a form of implicit child abuse that happened to them as very young children growing up, attempting to bond with a parent of the same sex and being rejected. That kind of rejection can be traumatic for a child depending on the degree of intensity of the rejection and how often it was experienced.
It remains me what my Trappist Abbott friend asked me after I came out to him, however, before I did I explained that I felt deep shame and that it was extremely difficult for me to tell him that I was gay. Immediately, after I came out to him, he said “Who told you you are bad!?!” I was as much stunned by what he said to me and as he was by my thinking that I was bad because I was gay. He continued to question me if I was ever abused as a child. I searched deep, deep down into my past and I could not say that I was honestly abused, ever! Nothing! However, he was right, which I found out later after being in therapy and learning more about the facts of sexual orientation that I was abused as a child. For me, I could see that it was quite unintentional, because it was not an explicit form of child abuse. I was implicitly abused as a child, because of being raised in a social environment that was antigay. Sexual orientation was not understood as the way a person bonds to another human being. A person’s sexual orientation is set very early in life, either just before birth or very soon after birth. For a child sexual orientation is expressed by just wanting to be close to another human being, to feel one with another. Bonding is significantly important in early childhood psychological development years growing up. To feel rejection during this time can be traumatic for a child. A child with any degree of a homosexual orientation growing up in the social environment influenced by social and religious antigay norms will more than likely experience this form of implicit child abuse, for some it can be explicit child abuse as well. In the movie Brokeback Mountain, Ennis’s flashback as a very young child he is recalling how his father took him out to see what happens to someone who loves someone of the same sex. It is a brutal scene of a man lying dead in a field after being dragged behind a pick-up truck. This is a severe form of child abuse supposedly to teach a child how to be inhuman to another human being, who loves someone of the same sex. Any form of child abuse has life long lasting effects.
Again, heuristically speaking, the antigay people that I have heard and read about never have any substantiated facts. Nothing! And it seems that the ones who are the most insistent are those from religious background that condemned homosexuality. According, to the sexual orientation continuum nearly 90% of the human population has some degree of a homosexual orientation. Is what we are experiencing from antigay people a form of “implicit child abuse?” Implicit child abuse experienced from the rejections of the attempts of wanting to bond with another human being, at a most vulnerable time for any child, an extremely cruel, inhuman treatment of any child. These children grow up to be adults and then become the aggressors, mistreating others the way they were mistreated as children.
One would wonder why are some people so outraged by Marriage Equality? Are these gay people who want to marry, stealing, killing, abusing private property, or harming anyone? Why would some antigay people feel the overwhelming need to decapitate, dismember and burn someone who is LGBT? In some countries, antigay people outright publicly kill homosexuals, beatings, hangings, stabbings, shootings and far worst.
Why? Why? Why? What causes this fierce angry wanting to do bodily harm to gay people who are harmless? Where did these antigay people, who are so religious, learn to be so inhuman to innocent people who only want to love someone and be married like anyone who wants to build a life together with the person they love? It is interesting that two gay people in love can turn some antigay people into raving homicidal maniacs. Two gay people “being in love” strikes terror in antigay people. Why? Could it be that this very act of loving, bonding to another person of the same sex, be the trauma that these antigay people are re-experiencing, remembering being rejected so harshly as very young children?
Human “Indifference” Suppressing Childhood Sexual Orientation
Assessing Global Violence & Unsubstantiated Antigay Teachings
To be continued...
Written by - Fr. Marty Kurylowicz
Related links:
Irish Catholic Church Covered Up Decades Of Child Abuse, Report Says – Huffington Post
Time for the faithful to choose our own bishops - VINCENT TWOMEY – The Irish Times
Bishop Donal Murray: Q&A – BBC News
Priests, police hid years of child sex abuse – ABC Online
A legacy of abuse and cover-up – Irish Times
Irish cleric calls for expulsion of the papal nuncio – BBC News
Pope to meet bishops over sex abuse report – UPI.com
Dublin child abuse report published – BBC News
Pope Benedict faces demand to dismiss Irish bishops in child abuse scandal – guardian.co.uk
Vatican 'ashamed' of Irish abuse report – BBC News
Scores seek help after abuse report – Washington Post
Vatican Scapegoats Gays and Leaves Criminals Unaccountable -Human Rights Campaign- September 15, 2002
"Kids Are Being Hurt !!!"
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