Wednesday, October 7, 2009

“…we can only love what is good existing in reality.” by St. Thomas Aquinas, Compendium Theologiae

Please, forgive me for this quick description about Marriage Equality and LGBTQI civil rights using the perspectives from 4 different disciplines collaboratively. First, from cognitive psychology, we know that our minds take in enormous amounts of sensory information (from the 5 senses) far more that we can consciously process. Our minds continually organizes this information in a manner that makes sense, altering our previous processed and stored information much in the same way that a computer downloads new information. Second, from social psychology we learn that the arguments presented to persuade people to change their personal attitudes are only those arguments that are presented with logic are consistent and the information is based on facts. Thirdly, we find from the theology of St. Thomas Aquinas, Compendium Theologiae, “…we can only love what is good existing in reality.” Lastly, from Dr. Daniel Goleman’s research on Destructive Emotions such as anger, he explains their effects (stress) our mental state of mind and then the negative impact that they tend to cause to our immune system. Dr. Goleman explains that the brains scanned by state-of-the-art brain imaging devices (fMRI, MRI) show how brains scanned of people who were angry showed that their brain activity was limited to only two small parts of the brain while the rest of the brain remained inactive. The opposite was true for brains scanned of people laughing; showed every part of their brains lights up meaning the brain activity was total.

I posted this reply below on Michael A. Jones – article on - U.S. Catholic Bishops Plan to Attack Gay Marriage with November Statement - Gay Rights -

Efforts to change attitudes we have to do a lot of homework, which is consistent to what you, stated, Love yourself and the rest will fall into

Love yourself begins by organizing our own personal information. This is equivalent to removing the plank from our own eye before trying to remove speck from our brother’s or sister’s eye. I have personally been through an enormous amount of psychotherapy. It is all related to being raised under the influence of the Vatican’s antigay teachings, as I explain on the Thalamus Center -> Impending rules on gay priests create Catholic divide – by Charles Honey – The Grand Rapids Press – October 8, 2005 * Benedict XVI -> SILENCING TRUTH

This is very helpful when talking to large groups of people because we begin to realize that we are not any different then the individuals in the group. When we realize our own fears and hang-ups and how hard it is to admit them to ourselves, let alone to others and that we have more yet to face. We are able to approach the people with a sense of reverence and respect to work more collaboratively with each member of the group.

Next, personally we cannot accept information that does not make sense to us. Information that we are able to accept even if it is unpleasant must be based on facts and been consistent. That is the way our minds work and stores information. The same is true when we are explaining information to people that we want them accept and hopefully change their attitudes. Therefore, we have to do our homework to study the facts and then present them to people.

St. Thomas, “…we can only love what is good.” This is truth we can never love evil or hate, it will always leave us unsettled and never at peace. I like to use this as measure when I am delivering a lecture or leading a discussion. Whatever I am unsettled about I need to identify and be conscious of when speaking in front of people. I need to be honest about whatever it is because people ability to keep up “baloney” is sharp and it can do damage to your whole presentation. People can accept honesty but not dishonesty, because back to St. Thomas, “…we can only love what is good.”

Lastly, anger is destructive in a group of people. Dr. Goleman explains how the brain is not working when we are angry. The old idea that we got to get our anger out by getting really angry has been proven to be destructive to ourselves. Constructively, if we work at identifying what makes us angry and why, this will us and help us to understand that the same process can be happening to others. We are better able to be patient and understanding of others. Next, before speaking to people about something that really angers we need to make sure we have backed every angry feeling with solid facts.

In this way, we are better able to help people accept and understand difficult information that will be a lasting changed in their attitudes and ours as well. All the above is built around your statement, Love yourself and the rest will fall into place.”

This is no easy task and we are continually updating ourselves, but working it out with others is very helpful. This is “love your neighbor as yourself.”

To be continued...

Written by Fr. Marty Kurylowicz

Important note: I mean no disrespect to Pope Benedict XVI or the hierarchy, the one and only concern is the safety and well-being of children.
Kids are being hurt!!!

Previously posted:

The importance and meaning of marriage is more than procreation. Two people pledging their love to each other is not just for themselves, because that is not a marriage. By being in love, two become one and they are better equip to be the best for everyone in world their families, friends, co-workers and beyond. In this way all marriages are contributing to the procreation of children by their enriching the social environment that children will be born into. True love is never lost.

The truth will set us free - not ignorance and fear.

Kids raised in social environments influenced by the Vatican’s antigay (unsubstantiated) teachings, as young as 4 or 5 know they're “different.” It is only as adults that they are able to identify that this feeling “different” was their experiencing their sexual orientation. However, as kids this feeling “different” their sexual orientation was experienced as highly unacceptable to the people they love and admire by their negative reactions. These kids, then at 4 and 5 years of age start to feel bad about themselves, because their “natural” expression of love for another human being is somehow terribly offensive to the important people in their lives. This type of rejection of a child at this young age, a significantly vulnerable time of expressing love can be traumatic for the child. Because for a child this rejection feels like abandonment.

These kids then tend to grow up with a pervasive sense of guilt, which sabotages their growth and motivation.

The result is thousands of dollars are spent in individual psychotherapy sessions for them to learn to accept their natural sexual orientation.

Does the Vatican want to take on this cost of their psychotherapy sessions just like the tobacco industry had to take on cost of the damage it caused their consumers?

Covering the cost of psychotherapy does not even begin compensate a person for a lifetime harmed by the Vatican’s antigay (unsubstantiated) teachings.

This is not taking into account the violence and harassment these kids are subjected to, because of the same social environmental influences of the Vatican’s antigay (unsubstantiated) teachings, which is also responsible for the high rate of LGBT youth suicides. We are talking about our kids and the safety and well-being of our kids. It boggles the mind that the Vatican, Benedict XVI, the hierarchy and their respective individual staff members do not see this harm to defenseless children as top priority to renounce their antigay teachings and protect the Kids!!! There is an overabundance of documentation by the medical and mental health professional associations and organizations identifying this kind harm inflicted on Kids! Still there are no civil laws to protect these children they remain defenseless, to the lifetime harmful effects of the Vatican, Benedict XVI and the hierarchy unsubstantiated antigay teachings. This is a continuation of Hitler’s atrocities of his crimes against humanity but this time it indiscriminately involves innocent children. It is unfortunate that we cannot depend on the Vatican or Benedict XVI or the hierarchy to protect children. History will not judge kindly the silence of civil governments, their lack of protecting children from the unsubstantiated antigay teachings. If children had the kind of money to afford legal assistance laws of protection would be formed and lawsuits for the harm caused like with the tobacco companies would force the Vatican to pay for the harm they have and continue to cause.

Written by Fr. Marty Kurylowicz

Important note: I mean no disrespect to Pope Benedict XVI or the hierarchy, the one and only concern is the safety and well-being of children.
Kids are being hurt!!!

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