Saturday, October 2, 2010

Suicide - Gay Teenager - New Jersey Gov. Christie Says Rutgers Suicide 'Unspeakable Tragedy – ABC News

NJ Gov. Wonders How Rutgers 'Spies' Can Sleep at Night After
Tyler Clementi's Suicide
By Linsey Davis and Emily Friedman
September 30, 2010 – ABC News

New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie today called the suicide of Rutgers University freshman Tyler Clementi an "unspeakable tragedy" and said he can't imagine how the two students accused of secretly filming Clementi can sleep at night "knowing that they contributed to driving that young man" to suicide.

The governor spoke hours after a body that was pulled from the Hudson River was identified as Clementi. The student leaped to his death after his roommate allegedly secretly filmed him during a "sexual encounter" with a man and posted it live on the Internet.

The medical examiner's office said an autospy revealed the 18-year-old had drowned and suffered blunt impact injuries to his torso.

Christie grew emotional when discussing Clementi's death.

"As the father of a 17-year-old…I can't imagine what those parents are feeling today, I can't. You send your son to school to get an education with great hopes and aspirations, and I can't imagine what those parents are feeling today," he said.

The governor also wondered about the two students accused of taping Clementi, bragging about it online and then trying to catch him on video a second time…

"Not only was Tyler incredibly intelligent, but he was an amazing violin player," said Guentert. "He stood out at every school concert, and never seemed to get nervous. The music really came from his heart."

Read complete article/video:

Rutgers student Tyler Clementi's final days before suicide emerge in online posts
by Kelly Heyboer/ The Star-Ledger

Private Moment Made Public, Then a Fatal Jump
By Lisa W. Foderaro, September 29, 2010
The New York Times

Prayers for Bobby (2009) (TV)

…Prayers for Bobby is the amazing true story of a mother torn between her loyalties, challenged by her faith, and moved by a tragedy that would change her life, and the lives of others, forever. Photo

Bobby Griffith (Ryan Kelly, Smallville) was his mother's favorite son, the perfect all-American boy growing up under deeply religious influences in Walnut Creek, California. Bobby was also gay. Struggling with a conflict no one knew of much less understood Bobby finally came out to his family. Despite the tentative support of his father, two sisters, and older brother, Bobby's mother, Mary (three time Academy Award nominee and Golden Globe winner Sigourney Weaver, Avatar, Working Girl), turned to the fundamentalist teachings of her church to rescue her son from what she felt was an irredeemable sin. As Mary came closer to the realization that Bobby could not be "healed," she rejected him, denying him a mother's unconditional love, and driving her favorite son to suicide. Photo

Anguished over Bobby's death, Mary finds little solace in her son's poignant diaries, revelations of a troubled boy fighting for the love of his mother and God. Finding it difficult to reconcile her feelings of guilt, her conflicted emotions over religious teachings, and her struggles with understanding her son's orientation, Mary finally, and unexpectedly, reaches out to the gay community as a source of inspiration and consolation. For Mary Griffith, it's the beginning of a long and emotional journey that extended beyond acceptance to her viable role a vocal advocate for gay and lesbian youth. In 1996, twelve years after Bobby's death, she was invited to address the Congress of the United States, establishing her as a major force in the fight for human rights.
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Watch video clip:

Threats, Silence, Harm and Disposal of Catholic Personnel Supportive of LGBT Adults and Children - Ratzinger/Benedict XVI’s Directives To Hierarchy
By Fr. Marty Kurylowicz

Gay Marriage - WITCH HUNTS ->
The Crucible (1996) -> McCarthyism 1940’s -1950’s, -> Benedict XVI 2005

Gay Marriage & Galileo:
Pope described as …"so averse to anything intellectual that everyone has to play dense and ignorant to gain his favor"
The Trial of Galileo - by Douglas O. Linder (2002)

           July 2010
President of the United States
United States Congress
United States Supreme Court

Dear -- --------,

My name is Fr. Marty Kurylowicz, a Roman Catholic priest from the Diocese of Grand Rapids Michigan ordained June 16, 1979.

In March 1997, after attending a National Symposium of the New Ways Ministry that was held in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, I learned that children as young as 4 and 5 years of age know that they are different. This feeling "different" is only identified in their adult years as being gay. However, the harmful influence of antigay social and religious norms -- in particular, for Catholics, the Vatican’s unsubstantiated antigay teachings -- are severe and last throughout a child’s lifetime. The harmful effects are not isolated only to these children who grow up to be gay, but also affect their families, siblings, friends and anyone whom they might consider special in their lives. They are a prescribed societal sentence of implicit isolation, which place at risk of suicide so many innocent adolescents and young adults. They stifle an enormous amount of human potential in the world that otherwise could be put to use for finding cures for diseases, offering better ways of maintaining peace among people and improving the quality of life for everyone in the world.
Gay Marriage - “SEPARATION BETWEEN CHURCH AND STATE” Does Not Give Churches Or Benedict XVI - The Freedom To Abuse Children or Adults. July 2010 - By Fr. Marty Kurylowicz

UNIDENTIFIED - Internalized Homophobia – Devastating, and Horrific Consequences On Innocent Children - PERPETUATING GENERATIONS HATRED & VIOLENCE

Internalized Homophobia
American Psychoanalytic Foundation Public Forum
Ralph Roughton, M.D. 1999

…When we speak of internalized homophobia, we refer to the shame, denigration and anger turned inward onto the self of the homosexual individual either as a re-internalization or from the absorption of homophobic attitudes in the environment and then identifying with the hated and feared object. The primary emotion is shame, but a whole gamut of inhibitions, loss of self esteem, depression and self-destructive behavior often follow.

My focus in this presentation moves from the individual internal dynamics to institutionalized homophobia and its effects, specifically the history of anti-homosexual prejudice in the theory, policies and practice of the American Psychoanalytic Association and to a brief description of the remarkable changes in this organization in the 1990’s.

...Homophobia, both my own internalized homophobia and that of our culture, kept me confused about my own sexuality for much of my life and kept me hiding in the closet for most of my life. It is a mark of the astonishing changes occurring in our culture and within psychoanalysis and concurrently in my own internal resolution of conflicts that last week I voluntarily allowed my coming out story to be told in Erica Goode’s excellent article in the New York Times and today here I stand in the Grand Ballroom of the Waldorf along with Paul because I am a gay psychoanalyst. Some might call this a manic defense or a counter-homophobic maneuver. I think it represents serious progress in the resolution of whatever it was that went on in this organization and in psychoanalysis that made it not only unsafe, but unthinkable, that made the words homosexual psychoanalyst virtually an oxymoron.

Now, what happened to begin the process of change? Richard Isay deserves credit for his persistent efforts in the late 1980’s and early 1990’s to get the leaders of the American to address the issue of anti-homosexual bias and specifically the effect of having virtually no gay or lesbian candidates in training or openly gay faculty. Eventually, against the strong opposition from a few members and reluctant action by the leadership, in 1991, a non-discrimination statement on homosexuality was adopted and amended in 1992 to include training and supervising analysts. In 1992, the Committee on Issues of Homosexuality was formed to identify areas of anti-homosexual bias and to work with institutes and the American toward opening up its institutes, changing attitudes, policies and curriculum.

What are the results?
Read complete address:

Homophobia Is Killing Our Youth
by Jason Mannino – April 17, 2009
Huffington Post

Today is a significant day for silence, youth, and our schools. Today, across the country schools will participate in a National Day of Silence to protest the homophobic bullying that is killing teenagers and honor those whose lives have been taken by the barbaric hands of hatred.

In less than two years there have been four brutal teenage deaths resulting from homophobic bullying. Just last week Carl Walker, an eleven year old in Springfield, Massachusetts , who never actually identified as gay, hung himself with an extension cord from the 3rd floor landing of his home. This was after his mother repeatedly implored his school to do something about the homophobic bullying he experienced. Last summer a transgendered teenager, Angie Zapata, was brutally murdered in Greeley, Colorado. Last February Eric Mohat, a 17-year old student from Ohio, who also never identified as gay, committed suicide after being repeatedly harassed with anti-gay epithets such as "fag" and "homo." His school went to trial last month as a lawsuit was filed by his parents, not because they want the school's money, but because they want to know why the school didn't respond to several requests for action. Also, last year, Lawrence King, a fifteen year old who identified as gay, was shot in the head twice in his English class. He died a few days later. His heart was donated the day after Valentine's day.
Read more:

Catholics Face Vocal 'Mutiny' Over Teachings On Gay Marriage
By Daniel Burke - October 1, 2010 – The Huffington Post


Joseph Palacios: Keeping faith in the fight for gay rights
by Sean Quigley, September 23, 2010
The Georgetown Voice - Georgetown University Photo

Catholics in support of gay rights - Georgetown Professor Launches Catholics for Equality
By Alice Maglio | Sep 28 2010
The Hoya – Georgetown University

Gay marriage -> Restoring "Hope of Love" To Children In Early Childhood -> Marriage Equality – March 23, 2010 – Fr. Marty Kurylowicz
Marriage Equality, like Galileo, is the truth about the facts of growing up gay. Marriage Equality will not become a reality until people learn that its most vital purpose is that it restores the “hope of love” to children in early childhood – essential to their development and well-being for life. Without Marriage Equality we teach children how to hate love and how to be mean and indifferent to people as adults. With all due respect, without Marriage Equality we would teach them in much the same way as has been shown by Benedict XVI and the hierarchy, especially in their lack of care and protection of children for decades.

Gay marriage - Sexual orientation
is less about sex and more about love, being one with another human being
Attachment Theory - LOVE & RELIGION

Hating Gays: An Overview of Scientific Studies
by Gregory M. Herek
Public Broadcasting Service (PBS)

…It frequently is assumed that feelings of personal threat result in strong negative attitudes toward homosexuality, whereas lack of threat leads to neutral or positive attitudes. This perspective often is associated with the term homophobia, and it derives from a psychodynamic view that prejudiced attitudes serve to reduce tension aroused by unconscious conflicts.

Attitudes are likely to serve a defensive function when an individual perceives some analogy between homosexual persons and her or his own unconscious conflicts. Subsequently, that person responds to gay men and lesbians as a way of externalizing inner conflicts and thereby reducing the anxiety associated with them. The conflicts specific to antihomosexual prejudice presumably involve a person's gender identity, sexual object choice, or both. For example, unconscious conflicts about one's own sexuality or gender identity might be attributed to lesbians and gay men through a process of projection. Such a strategy permits people to externalize the conflicts and to reject their own unacceptable urges by rejecting lesbians and gay men (who symbolize those urges) without consciously recognizing the urges as their own. Since contact with homosexual persons threatens to make conscious those thoughts that have been repressed, it inevitably arouses anxiety in defensive individuals. Consequently, defensive attitudes are likely to be negative… Photo - International Day Against Homophobia
Read complete article:

"Impending rules on gay priests create Catholic divide"
by Charles Honey – October 8, 2005
The Grand Rapids Press

When the Rev. Martin Kurylowicz came out to his Sparta parish eight years ago, he said he had struggled for years with his homosexuality.

The Catholic priest says the struggle would be made harder for many others if the Vatican issues new rules that reportedly would ban gays from becoming priests…

…"I sizzled when I read it," said Kurylowicz, 55. "It's very hurtful, is what it is. In this day and age, there's no reason for it. It sends a message that there's something wrong with gays."

Kurylowicz said he spoke out then to raise awareness of violence against gays and teach others homosexuality is not a choice but an inborn trait. Church leaders still don't understand that and contribute to gays' poor self-esteem, he said…

…"Kids as young as 4 or 5 know they're different," said Kurylowicz, a psychotherapist… "They grow up with this pervasive guilt, which sabotages their growth and motivation." The result is thousands of dollars in therapy to accept their natural orientation, he said, adding, "Does the Vatican want to take that on, like the tobacco industry had to take on for the damage it caused consumers? "…

Read complete article: by Charles Honey - Religion Editor - The Grand Rapids Press – Archives

Overturning Catholic Moral Teaching on Homosexuality:
Are Salzman And Lawler Right?
By Phyllis Zagano,
9/29/10 – The Huffington Post


…So the question is: what's "natural" or "unnatural?" That, in turns, leads to a more overarching question: Is homosexuality a status or a choice?

Some thinkers, including several members of the Supreme Court, seem to reason that homosexuality is an inborn status.

Catholicism--and, indeed most religions--teach that while homosexuality exists, homosexual activity is a "disordered" choice against the laws of nature.

If homosexuality is indeed a status rooted in biology or genetics, then homosexuals, like left-handed people, act according to their nature. But if homosexuality is a choice rooted in behavior, then homosexuals act against nature…

In terms of civil rights, individuals deserve and are afforded protections for both status (say, skin color) and choice (for example, religious affiliation).

In terms of morality, status is neutral, while choice has implications and consequences.

Catholicism argues that homosexuals deserve legal protections, but not because homosexuality is a status. Catholicism says homosexual activity is a choice. So while bishops support non-discrimination policies, they won't agree that homosexuals are protected because of their genetic makeup.

Catholic thinkers have grappled with this question for ages. Creighton University professors Todd A. Salzman and Michael G. Lawler are the latest voices on the Catholic circuit, Their 2008 book, "The Sexual Person,"…

Salzman and Lawler's dense academic argument turns traditional Catholic teaching on natural law on its head…

Salzman and Lawler argue that what is "natural" for a heterosexual is not "natural" for a homosexual, and therefore homosexuals and heterosexuals must act in accord with their personal "natures".
Read complete article:

The Sexual Person: Toward A Renewed Catholic Anthropology
By Todd A. Salzman, Michael G. Lawler 2008,+%22The+Sexual+Person,%22&source=bl&ots=GO9aPON40w&sig=DHIE7CBUEz7DKeqCNdlN_tktVhc&hl=en&ei=QA-lTOSJFMOjnAe9mdGQAQ&sa=X&oi=book_result&ct=result&resnum=1&ved=0CBIQ6AEwAA#v=onepage&q&f=false

Auschwitz - Christmas 2008
A flashback far more severe than
in Brokeback Mountain

The Significance of Brokeback Mountain
by Ralph Roughton
Self Psychology News – Fall 2007

Brokeback Mountain

The Psychology of the Closet: Governor McGreevey's New Clothes
by Jack Drescher, M.D. – August 27, 2004

Cat On A Hot Tin Roof - Tennessee Williams
Paul Newman & Burl Ives in 'Cat On a Hot Tin Roof' (1958) video clip

...If you needed a Big Daddy, why didn't you come to me?
If you wanted someone to lean on, why Skipper?
Why not me?
I'm your father.
You should've come to your kinfolk. Those who love you. Photo

You don't know what love means.
To you it's another four-letter word.
You've got a short memory.
- What did you want that I didn't buy?

- You can't buy love!


Don't, son.
Please don't cry.That's funny.
I never saw you cry before.
Did you ever cry as a kid?

Can't you understand? I never wanted your place or money. Photo
I don't want to own anything!
All I wanted was a father, not a boss!
I wanted you to love me.

“What the Pope Knew” 
Gary Tuchman, September 25, 2010
CNN & CNN International (Investigative documentary)

White-Hot 'Outrage'
Over The Capitol Hill Closet
May 9, 2009 
National Public Radio (NPR)

[Unsubstantiated] --- RELIGIOUS BELIEFS that gay and lesbian relationships are
SINFUL or INFERIOR to heterosexual relationships
HARM gays and lesbians.
Judge Vaughn Walker Ruling
California Prop 8. August 4, 2010

On Prop 8, it's the evidence, stupid
By Lisa Bloom
and related links:

Is It Possible to Be Against Same-Sex Marriage Without Being Homophobic?
Carlos A. Ball - Professor of Law at Rutgers University
August 24, 2010 – Huffington Post
A CNN poll released earlier this month has received considerable attention because it is the first national survey showing that a majority of Americans believe that same-sex couples should have the right to marry, a rate of support for gay marriage that is double what it was in 1996. The poll was released a few days after federal Judge Vaughn Walker, in striking down California's Proposition 8, concluded that defenders of that law had failed to introduce any evidence in court that same-sex marriages harm either society or individuals.

Now that opponents of same-sex marriage appear to be in the minority and that their allegations about the purported negative consequences of same-sex marriages have been discredited in federal court, it is fair to ask whether it is possible to oppose marriage equality without at some level, whether consciously or unconsciously, being prejudiced against gay people.
Read complete article:

Archbishop John Nienstedt on
Catholic Church's opposition to same-sex marriage
by Tom Crann,
September 22, 2010 - Minnesota Public Radio

Quotes Nienstedt:
“Marriage isn't something that we create as human beings. It's already a given from the work of creation by almighty God.”

“We've been labeled as discriminating against gay people. There's no discrimination when there isn't a basic right to something. And those who have the right to marriage are men and women who want to enter into a life-long, mutually supportive and procreative relationship.”

“Marriage came long before there was any government.
And so this is a natural reality, and it's defined by the natural law, what we call the natural law. And so it precedes any government. And government is meant to support marriage between a husband and a wife in order to give it a context for the raising of children and the protection of children.”

“Audio excerpt from Nienstedt's remarks: The archdiocese believes that the time has come for voters to be presented directly with an amendment to our state constitution to preserve our historic understanding of marriage. In fact, this is the only way to put the one man, one woman definition of marriage beyond the reach of the courts and politicians.

Crann: Is that, in fact, a political statement?
Nienstedt: I don't believe so, no. I think that's a reasonable, common sense thing.”
Read more:

Anti-gay marriage DVDs - UNSUBSTANTIATED - Nienstedt (Minnesota) & Benedict XVI, gay marriage, like Galileo Against Nature law – “It is Common Sense” ??? -> Kids Are Being Hurt!!!

John Nienstedt's anti-gay marriage crusade draws another protest
by ‎Hart Van Denburg,
September 29, 2010 - Minneapolis City Pages

California Prop 8, Aug, 4, 2010 - Deep misunderstanding - "We the People" means - US Constitution – DANGERS of majority rule - a reflection of prejudice, intolerance, ignorance, panic and crude self-interest…
by Geoffrey R. Stone - Chicago Tribune,0,2223308.story

Geoffrey R. Stone is a law professor at the University of Chicago.
Same-Sex Marriage: A Selective Bibliography of the Legal Literature
by Paul Axel-Lute - Rutgers School of Law–Newark  Photo

“Someday, maybe, there will exist a well-informed, well considered and yet fervent public conviction that the most deadly of all possible sins is the mutilation of a child’s spirit.”
Erik Erikson

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